If you want a man to change, don’t hold up a mirror

Men – particularly young men – do a lot of stupid stuff. Sometimes really dangerous stupid stuff. They drive too fast, get too drunk, get stoned, get high, get fat, fight, fornicate, often all at once. People get hurt, people die, and so governments have to do something about it.

One of the things governments do is turn to advertising agencies because we’re expert at selling stuff. But selling behaviour change is not like selling a tin of Milo. It’s about a thousand times more difficult, and quite possibly a task beyond advertising alone. Hundreds of millions of dollars have been spent on advertising in Australia trying to get men to change, and for the most part it’s been a complete waste of money. Men don’t change much, and when they do it’s mostly in order to get laid. (In fairness to blokes, people don’t change much. One only has to watch The Seven Sins of England to see how the social problems that plague the UK today have been plaguing it for centuries, regardless of government interventions.)

We don’t pretend to have the answer. However, while chatting with some clinical psychologists about Aussie blokes we heard something that might help. They said the worst way to get a man who was behaving badly – drinking, cheating, shouting at the kids – to change was to hold a mirror up to his behaviour. Men respond poorly to criticism, so confronting them about it – “Look at what you’re doing” – usually backfires. They shut down, don’t listen, and keep doing what they were doing before.

Could this be why so many government campaigns fail? We think it might. Most of these “social marketing” campaigns – like the recent binge drinking one from NSW Health – show the bad behaviour. They hold up a mirror. Our psychologists would argue that’s the least effective thing to do. What would be better? In a counselling environment, it would be three things in combination:

1) show the impact of his behaviour not on himself, but on someone whose opinion he cares about (particularly his kids, his mum, or a woman he’d like to screw)

2) deliver a credible threat of losing something he values (this will be of no surprise to Nudge readers)

3) provide actions – men are doers, not thinkers, so give him new things to do

We recognise it’s nearly impossible to do all that in an ad. But an advertising campaign working in tandem with new government policy could! Imagine if the RTA’s fantastic “Pinkie” campaign (which showed the impact of speeding behaviour on women and mates) was accompanied by a law which impounded the vehicles of young speeders (a threat of loss), as well as an “arsehole zone” sticker sent to everyone under 25 to stick (something they can do) on their speedo at 80km – when the needle goes above it, you’re in the arsehole zone (reinforcing the new/better behaviour).

How do these three things – impact on others, loss aversion, and new behaviours – apply to your business? (They have application far beyond government campaigns alone…)

Is the internet killing traditional Australian masculinity?

Digital evangelists have long said ‘The internet changes everything’. Sometimes they’re right. Mostly it’s hype. But one thing that does seem to be changing as a result of the internet is the ‘Aussie bloke’. VB is in decline, soccer is on the rise, Aussie bands play synthesizers as often as guitars, Bonds have moved beyond the blue singlet, and Aussie dads are globally ranked as some of the best.

We recently went to The Easter Show for the first time in 20 years, expecting to see what we saw before: a sea of blokes in trackydacks, Bonds singlets, Blundstones with pushed-down footy socks, beating their brats with dagwood dogs. Instead we saw blokes with hair gel, Ed Hardy T-shirts, cool shades, fedora-shaped hats, smelling of deodorant and genuinely enjoying time with their children.

What on earth has happened? Where is the Castlemaine cliché that once ruled the roost?

Well, we don’t know for sure, but we think the internet killed him. Australian men – especially those under 40 - are plugged into a global culture as never before. They’re crafting identities from bits and pieces found all over the world, combined with what they have here at home. They’re walking into hair salons with pictures of Cristiano Ronaldo and tattoo parlours with pictures of Tim Cahill. They’re emulating The Situation one day, Ben Cousins the next. They listen to Kid Cudi and AC/DC, and wine and soccer are no longer for ‘wankers, fags and wogs’.

Planner-extraordinaire Dan Pancras has worked in the UK, US and Australia on brands like Lynx, Levis, Telstra and McDonalds. He has a fascinating take on the globalisation of Australian maleness that is well worth a listen. Click here and enjoy it with a fine Pinot Noir.

Tradies will pay big bucks on grooming (if you get the experience right)

Patrick Kidd was a young sparky who’d spend over $100 on a haircut. He moisturised, too. He knew to keep these things hidden from the older blokes on site to avoid the “poofter” jibes, but as Patrick says “to get the girl nowadays you have to look sharp”. And he realised he wasn’t alone. Patrick and his tradie mates were wedged between a $10 clipper cut that left you all looking the same, and a $200 style for which you left your balls (and wallet) at the door.

All this screamed “gap in the market” to Patrick, so he downed his soldering iron and opened Patrick’s Haircuts for Men. The place is tailored for blokes: free beer, a coffee table that invites you to put your feet on it, comfy couches, a motorbike, flat screen TVs and a “something for the weekend” condom when you leave. Three years later - despite everyone telling him it wouldn’t work - business is pumping. He’s about to open new stores and launch his own line of grooming products.

Nowadays tradies with waxed abdominal muscles appear on magazine covers. No more snail trails over beer guts. The ladies on RSVP wouldn’t stand for it! And as men change, grooming is exploding. In fact, male grooming is one of the fastest growing retail categories, hence ‘Dove for Men’. But in Australia, you have to get the experience right – you have to leave your customers feeling like a bloke after they use your product. This is why we’re dubious about Dove and Nivea for men in Australia – without significant rebranding, they’re simply too female. Our money is on entrepreneurs like Patrick launching new male grooming brands that get the bloke-vs-fag balance right for our market.

Click here to listen to the full interview with Patrick.

Want an Australian male to do something? Get his woman to do it first.

Recently we spoke with two clinical psychologists who work with couples. One of the interesting things they spoke about is how, unlike women, most men don’t have a “relationship agenda” – a mental list of things they want to get from the partnership (other than enough sex). Most men follow their woman, letting her agenda drive most of their lives together – where to live, what couch to buy, what colour to paint the kitchen, whether to get married, when to have kids, etc.

This reminded us of something a client, James Sykes, said when talking about how Australian men are adapting to the new expectations of Australian women: “In the fight for a mate… guys have to exhibit their sophistication more often, if not constantly. So increasingly what they buy are things that are endorsed by girls they know. Aussie guys are changing, driven by what’s happening with girls.”

That the real decision maker is often the women is not new – just talk to anyone who sells flat-screen TVs, cars or furniture. But it’s not something marketers tap into enough. For “male” purchases, it’s no longer just about “winning over the woman” at the end of the sales process. It’s about getting her on board right at the start. Because once she’s given it her stamp of approval, her man will follow.

Click here to listen to the full interview with James Sykes, the marketing director at Jim Beam.